Conflict Resolution and me

By Nipun Chadha " Trust the wait.  Embrace the uncertainty. Enjoy the beauty of becoming. When nothing is certain, anything is possible."  - Mandy Hale You know the feeling of driving on roads that are unknown?  How clueless you feel seeing the path in front of you; And how you are constantly trying to figure the way out of reach to a desirable point from somewhere you started.  Compare this to how you feel driving on the roads just outside your home. How comfortable it is, how prepared you are for the potholes. Just how easy it is to be in the moment. The point I am trying to make is that uncertainty is uncomfortable . Especially when you are in a very comfortable bubble.  But here’s a thing about bubbles. The higher they fly, higher is the probability of that bubble breaking due to the pressure it deals with. Yes, uncertainty is uncomfortable.  But coming back to my example of an unknown road.  Do you know how amazing it feels when you finally reach ...

I was sorry that I was different. He said he loved me, but he didn't know how. Maybe he tried his best. He demanded I fight his demons for him because he failed. I tricked myself into believing they were my demons. He left and I didn't say anything. I felt like I was kind. No one bought it. The ground beneath my feet began to shift violently. Doubt began to seep. I stopped believing I was smart. The days became long. I took every relationship that had shown me unconditional love and smashed it into pieces. There was a relief though, there was nothing left to screw up. I was finally alone. I let myself cry. I stopped struggling. Everything turned very still. I thought I'd die, but my heart kept beating. It didn't care about what I thought. My heart stopped apologizing. It became quiet. I was still breathing. If I fell, I knew that I could get up. It was hard at first. I stopped fretting and started exploring. I practiced falling. I was always stuck at a question; You ca...

There are infinite ways I can miss you, maybe the list is short but my reason is huge. Or maybe I've got a trillion lists of tiny reasons but both are the same dull ache. Perhaps I do have both. My little list no longer makes sense, just like it simply no longer exists. My longer list is not meaningless, it's all about him. I miss those things that he used to say. I miss the songs that he would play in his car. I miss the way he was excited about meeting me even after we met just a few days back. I miss how he loved me every time he looked at me. I miss his geekiness about movies and shows. He was a lost cause, but I miss him. I loved the way he chased passion. I miss the way he loved adventure and made our days a ride of a roller coaster.  Mostly, though, I miss things that haven't happened yet. You can't actually miss them because you never knew your life with them in it, but you can't help but think about how great it would have been. I miss things like this on b...

"This friendship and love are too fictional, People just keep trying to make them real. It doesn't work." The idea of love is drilled into our minds, through every fictional movie and tv shows we watch, through every romantic novel we read, through every picture made to look like love. I did not develop love correctly, perhaps, everything felt tough, bleak, dramatic, volatile and bad. And every stable relationship of commitment and stability around me made me uneasy. Generally, I believe the need to feel affection, chills and thrill of a relationship is valid and a winnable need, What's tragic is that it's often dismissed. If you've never been in love or in a relationship, I'd hate to be the one breaking it to you but MAGIC FADES. It's a matter of time. But that's where you discover what's real and what's not. No matter how good or bad it'll be for you, with time you'll realize your partner will be a mix of qualities a...